Occident Prone

Welcome to Australia’s wild West

7 ways to survive WA’s gas crisis

Posted by occidentprone on June 24, 2008

The state government tells us the gas crisis will last another six months. As winter gives way to spring, and then summer we will all still be ignoring pleas to ease back on energy use. But if you do want to do your bit and halve energy consumption between now and December, as suggested by the Chamber of Commerce and Industry, here are some tips to help you on your way. 

  1. Pull on a jumper, turn off unused lights, don’t leave appliances plugged in, all that stuff.
  2. Throw off the electric blanket and switch off the heater: Ask a colleague for a threesome. Although not official government policy, it is endorsed by the Energy Minister who would if he could.
  3. Fill your car up with petrol then realise the “gas crisis” isn’t the worst thing to happen this year.
  4. Come summer there are a whole lot of other problems that come with keeping cool. In extreme heat tempers fray so we can all be charitable by lifting a colleague’s top for a little temporary (light) relief. 
  5. Sort your Apache Energy blasts from your Apache Indian’s boom shak alak. Easily confused, but no, dodgy sub-continent hip hop is not responsible for this crisis. Maybe in India he has a lot to answer for but we are blaming the American gas company for this.
  6. Leave the house and use someone else’s energy. If you are in any position of power you could get a lobbyist to take you to lunch, but only if you can stomach an hour of staring into the sweaty, puffy face of the ugly side of business. Life is full of such trade-offs.
  7. Stay home, turn off the lights, computer and telly and curl into the foetal position. Accept that we are stuffed. Uncurl only to vote at the next state election.
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One Response to “7 ways to survive WA’s gas crisis”

  1. Sunili said

    Hahahaha gold!

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